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Sunday, March 27, 2011

Solutions, not Problems…

I received the following e-mail the other day. I will admit that I, for one, do not understand all the foreign aid our elected officials have deemed necessary for us to spend. I would love to see world hunger eliminated, but, let's feed the hungry in our own country, first. It seems we try to cure the world's problems. How can we cure a World problem when it exists here in our own country? I know what the problems are. I don't need to hear anymore problems, what I'm interested in is solutions. It sounds like a fairytale, but I have to admit, I like the solutions presented here.

WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S. PRESIDENT, DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN, GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH?


My fellow Americans:
As you know, the defeat of the Iraq regime has been completed.
Since congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our mission in Afghanistan is complete.
This morning I gave an order for a complete removal of all American forces from Afghanistan....
This action will be complete within 30 days.
It is now time to begin the reckoning.
Before me, I have to lists.
One list contains the names of countries which have stood by our side during the Afghan conflict.
The list is short.
Spain, Bulgaria, Australia, and Poland are some of the
countries listed here.
The other list contains everyone not on the first list.
Most of the world's nations are on that list.
My Press Secretary will be distributing copies of both lists
later this evening.
Let me start by saying that effective immediately,
foreign aid to those nations on list 2 ceases indefinitely.
The money saved during the first year alone will
pretty much pay for the cost of the Afghan war.
Then, every year thereafter I'll go to our Social Security system
so it will go broke in 20 years.
The American people are no longer going to pour money
in the Third World " HELL HOLES "
and watch those government leaders grow fat
on corruption.
Need help with a famine? Wrestling with epidemic?
Call France.
In the future, together with Congress, I will work
to redirect this money toward solving the vexing social problems
we still had at home. On that note, a word to terrorist organizations.
Screw with us and we will write you down and eliminate you
and all your friends from the face of the earth.
Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize?
Try France or maybe China.
I'm ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with
France and Russia.
Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are retiring
from NATO as well.
I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many
UN diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more
than two unpaid parking tickets to sites where these vehicles will be
stripped, shredded, and crushed. I don't care whatever
treaty pertains to this. You creeps have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets.
Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers,
and limos be turned over to some of the finest
chop shops in the world.
I love New York.
Special note to our neighbors: Canada, you are on List 2.
Since we are likely to be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might
try not pissing us off for a change.
Mexico is also on List 2. Its president and his entire corrupt government
really need an attitude adjustment. I will have a couple of thousand extra tanks and infantry divisions
sitting around. Guess where I'm gonna put 'em?
Yep, Border Security.
Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the
NAFTA Treaty-starting now.
We're tired of the one-way highway.
Also starting immediately, we will be drilling for oil in Alaska, which will take care
of this country's oil needs for decades to come. If you're an environmentalist
who opposes this decision, I refer you to list 2 above:
if the country and move there.
It's time for Americans to focal on its own welfare and its own citizens. Some will accuse us of
isolationism. I answered them by saying, "Damn Right"
nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world has only
earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet.
It is time to eliminate hunger in America. It's also time to
eliminate homelessness in America.
To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thank you and we won't forget that we owe you.
To the Nations on List 2, a final thought: you might want to learn to speak Arabic.
God bless you America. Thank you and good night.
(If you can read this in English, thank a soldier)
Why can't we elect officials that are truly interested in the welfare of their citizens? What happened to accountability? What happened to America First? How did we become the world's police department? Does anyone get what I'm trying to say? Let me put it another way. You know when you're traveling on an airline? The emergency speech tells us to put OUR oxygen mask on first, before we try to help someone else. Before we "fix" the world, we have to "fix" our own problems. I'm sick and tired of our government doling out our money to foreigners that don't give a crap about the United States. Contrary to the media, we are still the greatest country that's ever been on the face of the earth.


Dad gummit, we slipped back into winter today. Here in West Texas, it's cloudy, cold (38°), and downright dreary. I did read the extended weather report and Spring will be back early this week. I have made some real progress around my house, and expect to have it cleaned out and all polished up, by the end of the week. As I mentioned earlier, I have contacted a realtor. I'm having some second thoughts, though. I'm thinking maybe, I could do better with listing it on Craigs list, eBay, and the local newspaper. I have a friend that sold his house by putting an ad in the newspaper. If you recall, my home is located in a small resort area, close to Lubbock, Texas. My friend told me that he got over 100 phone calls in the first two hours, the day the ad came out. He sold his house the same week. If I list with a realtor, the commission will be over $20,000. I really have to consider all my options. Any suggestions?
As always, I am marching towards my dream.
Michael
p.s. If you read all the way down here, here is your reward for your diligence. I guarantee you're gonna LOL

3 comments:

  1. Michael, You could try selling it on your own first....even if just for a week. You can always list with a Realtor later. I sold my house by advertising it online with a local classifieds and it sold two days later for full asking price.

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  2. It cooled down here in east Texas yesterday, only got up to the low 70's. Today if the sun don't come out it will get to the low 80's. Like I commented on your last blog, I will be wathcing your progress toward full-timeing.

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